Rain washed over the earth these past few days leaving behind the scent of wet grass, wet earth, and night blooming jasmine. It also left the promise of a blooming spring filled with bouquets of daisies, daffodils, tulips, and cactus flowers.

While staring out my window at the falling rain and listening to the thunder, I was brought to remembering many past regressions - the type that would have me beating my heart-center with closed fist while I repeated: “through my fault, through my fault, through my most grievous fault.”

These remembered situations and moments felt impaled and well-guarded within the structure of my being. I was so young and wanted so much from life. The honey that dripped from love’s vessel gave way to the adventures of life’s temptations. I now blush when I think of things I dropped into and allowed myself to relish. I see now how easily I placed a blindfold around God’s eyes so I could tenaciously play in the forbidden playgrounds of life’s circus.

Rain, rain don’t go away cleans me still another day!

The purification came through its showers of holy water. The holy rain bathed my soul as it gently murmured deep in me “shame, shame go away come again another day...or not.”

I continued to look out my window and felt deep compassion and forgiveness for that young woman in her 30’s, 40’s, and 50’s. I saw promises brought forward by nature’s spring cycle. I saw the beauty of my life and the gratitude for each and every one of those missed-demeanors - experiences that gifted me with the power of self-knowing, self-love, of growth and insights and so many blessings.

In minutes, the clouds disappear and the sun burst through. The warm rays embraced my vulnerable body as I wiped away my tears. I took a deep breath. My cracked but well-healed heart began to sing again:

“Shame, shame go away come again another day...or not!”